“Etiquette" Why are some amazing at it? Why are some terrible? Why is it important in the music business?

By: Sean McKenna

​Etiquette (/ˈɛtikɛt, -kɪt/) can be defined as a set of norms of personal behavior in polite society, usually occurring in the form of an ethical code of the expected and accepted social behaviors that accord with the conventions and norms observed and practiced by a society, a social class, or a social group. 

“Etiquette”. Why are some amazing at it? Why are some terrible? Why is it important in the music business? 

Can’t believe we are talking about this, but here we are. A friend in Toronto, Ontario asked someone to a fill in show for them a while ago. He had to get a dental procedure and was not going to be able to do the shows. He asked a friend to fill in.  The new person rehearsed with the band, and the band told him the fill in player spent the entire weekend lobbying for the position. “Get rid of him, I’m better”. “I am going places” etc. 3/4 band guys told him in no uncertain terms this was extremely off putting. One of the band members said “Well, something to think about”. The guy even had a family member lobbying during the show.

Why don’t you do this?
-probably the lowest thing one can do
-the person should never be asked back
-the band member should be replaced 
- you are a guest, that is not the place
- you show people at a gig that isn’t your’s, you are not a team player 

It’s not your gig, you are being asked because someone thought enough of you to ask. And believe it when it’s said anyone who does that will make a name for themselves. Not in a good way. Be smart. Don’t be desperate, don’t be greasy. The music business, for what appears to be very vast, is actually the opposite. It is very small. When you do something well, it’s discussed. When you don’t, it circulates like wildfire. Showing up, being prepared, doing a great job, not being a problem. These are what get you invited back and invited to other shows. You have to play the long game. Sometimes, it’s not that long. 

I’ve had the opportunity to get to know Leland Sklar, Rich Redmond (Jason Aldean), Francis Ruiz (Buckcherry) Pete Evick (Bret Michel’s Band), amping others. This information is straight from them. You want gigs, practice this proper ediquette. You will be thankful you did.

Sean P McKenna is the host of the podcast “Barstools and Bandtalk”, as seen in Canadian TV, and hearts on the “Rock Rage Radio” network. He is a career live and audio drummer and “Mapex Drums artist”. He works with Canadian independent artist Michelle Ryder, who, in a short period of time, has amassed a global following with her music. Sean is available for info sessions, recording and artist interviews at [email protected]